Paris at this time was full of artists, writers, and thinkers of all sorts. The worst of the lot, in Rodney's excellent opinion, were the philosophers. They took up too much space at the cafes, and tended to drive up the price of coffee. Also, they all pretended that staying up late drinking wine and talking was a great undertaking, advancing human understanding, when clearly they were just interested in having sex and getting drunk with smart people in weird clothing.
There was one philosopher that Rodney found particularly annoying, with floppy hair, a tendency to wear only black shirts and trousers, and an aggravating skill at debate. The man would slouch his way through an argument, looking ready to fall over and snore at any moment, and then suddenly slam home a profound conundrum before stealing Rodney's wine glass and nabbing whatever woman might actually have been ready to go home with him that evening. Furthermore, he refused to recognize Rodney's genius, though he clearly knew his way around an art studio. And worst of all, the only time Rodney had managed to win an argument with him, he turned out to have been napping through the last twenty minutes of Rodney's perfect rebuttal.
Still, Rodney had hope of weaning him from Nietzsche and Sartre, and convincing John that surrealism was superior to existentialism as a means of apprehending reality, since the surrealist could incorporate scientific approaches into his work in a way a philosopher could only envy. He dealt with measurable phenomena, and not mere opinions. John would surely learn to see the light of reason, and Rodney was the man to show it to him.
It seems so obvious! And yet, I look through the internets, and there is no record of these events.
It reminded me of just how flexible in interpretation John Sheppard really is, and I suspect we have The Flan's disconnect from the dramatic opportunities and the genre to thank for this. I've never warmed up to Cameron Mitchell, and I think part of the reason for that is that Ben plays his similar character so much more connectedly. I suspect I just don't *like* the standard SciFi Network hero, and Sheppard's quirkiness and just *weirdness* makes me like him so much more. When Cameron makes comments about the Asgard, I think he's a bigoted jerk. When Sheppard does, I think he's a complete dork, and watching him whisper about it to Rodney makes me a little fond of him.
He doesn't always strike the right note, and that makes him a lot more interesting. He often doesn't seem particularly genuine, which says to me that there is a whole Sheppard under the surface that we don't get to see directly, and so I'm going to try to put into words one version of who John Sheppard might be.
But, that'll do for now.
I'm glad there are so many different Sheppards around. If the show pins him down, some of them will fade, and I'll miss them. Yay for The Flan's ambiguity!
Some folks out there are already watching Season 3!
Meanwhile, I wait more or less patiently, and with a smidgen of dread. Who knows what will happen to the folks I’ve learned to love? So here are a handful of story recs, to keep me occupied. There are many excellent stories in Stargate:Atlantis fandom, but these ones all have something special in them.
All of the following are John & Rodney stories, though the form of the relationship varies.
- The remix of "Left to Fend" is “The Body Holographic” by Leah and Springwoof. Most of you may well have read this already, but if you haven’t, you might consider it. This is a tragic story, with moments of joy and humor and insight that goes far beyond the world of SG:A, but never leaves it.
- For the pornly drama section of these recs, I’m going to suggest “Little Thing” by ladyflowdi (Diannan). The characterizations here are unusual, and interesting. A viable take on how things could go between them.
John’s ass may be little, but it’s important to him. Fortunately or unfortunately for him, Rodney likes it too. Maybe they’ll eventually compromise.
- This one is gen, and I have some problems with the internal logic of the story. And yet, I whole-heartedly recommend this one. “Running on Empty” by Sholio is a fully-realized story of survival in dangerous circumstances, with a healthy dose of the kind of brotherly love that leads many of us to slash in the first place.
- “That Pon Farr Thing” worked on me like a healing balm, a day when I felt really down. Whenever mmmchelle writes John/Rodney, I can easily believe they genuinely care for each other. That’s even better with snark and orgasms.
- “Hold Hands and Try to Look Sincere” by minervacat has a little of everything; hot sex, strong feelings, manly idiocy, and aliens who make them do it. Plus? She gets the voices just right. I’ve come back to this one twice already, and I probably will again. It’s tight.
Three hours to Ronon, Rodney, John, Teyla, and the rest of those crazy, crazy Lanteans.
Why don't I conform to liking the ones that I should?
Why do I cling desperately to the ones I should let go?
How can I bribe people to write the ones that I want? Heh.
Seriously, I don't always understand my own mind. I should technically love Rodney/Carson stories, but I just don't. I love Rodney, so much, and Carson is his pal and also? They kissed! But Carson's insanity doesn't explain my complete inability to read him in anything sexual at all. There is no reason, but he will forever be that uncle-like sort of sweet yet scary mad scientist, and it doesn't even help that I usually find mad scientists uber-hot. Some writers can get me to read, but even then I kind of blank out the Carson sex. No clue here, he must just remind me of someone, though I don't know who. And considering how many people I'll pair Rodney up with happily, this is very odd.
I can easily pair Sheppard, technically, with anyone in the show. It's like in AtS where the hero gets so much contact with everyone in the cast that any shippers using Angel could make a case with no effort. But I don't *like* him with anyone unless it's Rodney, or Hth is writing it. It's not that I'm against him with anyone else (please! more the merrier, say I, so pair him with anyone you like and joy to you), it's that I'm gone. I'm just wandering off and finding the one where he and Rodney blow up another planet by accident and get thrown in the brig together, but then Atlantis is captured by aliens and they are forgotten, left to certain death and have to have sex. or whatnot. There are exceptions, of course, but they never feel quite right to me. If Rodney is with Teyla, or Ronon? I'm a brute, I think, because I love Sheppard to pieces when he pines. So much love. And it isn't that he's loving Rodney, it's the way Sheppard himself feels to me when he loves Rodney, because of who he is and who Rodney is.
I should *not* like Weir/Dex, especially NC17, because I usually find Elizabeth strangely off-putting sexually. And it should ping too many Fabio/random heroine buttons. But I do! They are perfect in my head.
Ronon/Teyla should knock me out, because I love Teyla and she's smoking hot and so is Ronon, who makes me wibble on a regular basis. But, though I find them wholly believable as a pairing, and am all for them, nothing. Now, if someone can direct me to the story that will correct this, please do. Ronon/Teyla is... everything beautiful and wise and. That's the problem, isn't it?
I think I'm starting to get it.
So people, enough about me. How about you? Tell me about the pairings you love that you ought to hate, or the ones you hate that you ought to love.
ETA: and by 'hate' I mean, not want to read at the moment. I'm operating under the "more fan fiction of any pairing for my show is good" theory of other people's pairings.
And it has this guy, who has to sleep in a bed with this woman, only! How wrong, they aren't married blah-blah-blah, so he puts his sword down the center of the bed.
Of course his name is Sigurd, or Sigmund, or something, but all the legendary Norsemen seem to be named Sig-something, so it gets confusing.
But! The point is, later on they have sex and marry and then she poisons him (not necessarily in that order, no wait, it was in that order), but it's not her fault because he was tramping around with some queenly ho who gave him a potion or whatnot, anyway it doesn't end well. The important thing being, that sword or no, they still end up doing the nasty.
So in the end, the sword is symbolic of all the sex they'd like to be having if it weren't for conventional morality, and also avoiding sliced private parts.
Which brings me to another SG:A story that really should be out there, the one in which Rodney and John or Rodney and Ronon or maybe Lorne and Kavanagh have to Share a Bed, but due to manly convention know they oughtn't to have sex. But they both really want to, as displayed through heavy symbolism.
Anyone seen this story yet?
iibnf gave me what I needed, with her lovely "The Birds and the Bees and the Bats and the Robots".
Do watch the youtube vid she links to; it's powerfully funky. In fact, watch it first. It'll enhance your experience.
But Elizabeth's crazy, not stupid, and she eventually realizes what he is doing. There's an ugly meeting, Teyla cold and solemn-faced, Ronon standing protectively close to John, and John trying to charm his way out of the hole his lies have put him in. But his little-boy schtick isn't working these days, with the shadows under his eyes and him being so angry all of the time. Elizabeth is steely-eyed and sets him a direct order; stop searching for Rodney and get with the program.
Ronon and Teyla have taken to sleeping wrapped around John, trying to keep him from his nightmares. They can't get him to let go of his obsession, and they don't even want to, really. Teyla keeps remembering Aiden Ford, and wonders if they will see a new man in Rodney's body when they do find him. When John screams in his sleep, or calls out Rodney's name, Ronon feels guilty, because he was getting treatment for mild frostbite when Sheppard lost Rodney on M8X-462. He thinks he could have taken all six of the men who took McKay, and saved Sheppard from himself.
Meanwhile, the temperatures are dropping rapidly, and they need McKay more than ever, as systems shut down in the extreme cold. Zelenka predicts dangerous storms. The Athosians are afraid, their elders making dire forecasts of the future, and there is a rumor being passed around that Rodney's ghost has been seen in the laboratories at night. John can't stop shivering, even between Ronon and Teyla, and makes a desperate decision.
When he next goes through the stargate, he goes alone.
Okay then, that's solved THAT crisis.
Back to the important stuff.
The bit with the close quarters and John's history that I will never write.
Glanced, decided to spend the day as a not-a-masochist, left. Whew, dodged that bullet.
I'm staying in the happy zone, this week. There's stories to not write, and I'm just the fan not to write them.
Like the one where Ronon finds out he has inherited the entire planet of Satedie, Sateda's vacation resort world. And it turns out to have a wish-granting machine, so it's a little like Fantasy Island, and Ronon is the host. He abandons the team and sets up shop, making people's wishes come true. But of course team Sheppard goes there and their wish is to have Ronon back, cue heart-stirring hijinks.
My favorite bit is the part where Rodney uncovers the wish machine, and finds out it is powered by little people who live under the ground and look a little bit like brownies, and have vestigial wings.
So, if I did, here's the story I would write for the virgin challenge over at the sga flashfic journal. It was of course inspired by Speranza's story, which I'm not linking because you've either read it/are about to read it or hate John/Rodney, virgins, alien rituals, or all three. Anyway! Here's what I'd write.
Incredibly advanced aliens have developed this awesome space ship with beaming technology, a virtual deck, diagnostic/healing chamber, and full bar. They did this because they were rescued from the Wraith by the Ancestors, given a safe haven via experimental shield technology, and taught cool science as a sort of brain trust colony. And told to build a ship.
In the ten thousand years they've been waiting for someone with the Ancient gene to show up, they've gotten a bit religious, and come up with some odd ideas about Ancients. So they won't share most of the goods with Atlantis, but they have made the space ship as per the instructions left by their mentors. Obviously they're ready to hand the ship over to John, with his handy-dandy ability to light up the town, but there's a catch: they expected him to be a virgin. He, well, isn't.
But no problem! Amongst their other accomplishments (static-free dryers, genuinely healthy and flavorful yet delicious snack foods, instantaneous wart removers, personal levitators) they've developed the Timespace Transverser, which John comes to know as the Cosmic Cockblocker. Because they can (and do!) send an agent into Earth's past at various points, and his mission? To effectively prevent John Sheppard from getting laid.
The agent pops into the machine, there is a whirring, he comes back out, and Sheppard? Is as pure as the driven snow. The poor bastard.
Rodney rather likes the planet, as he now has a viable way to explain his own lack of frequent action. And also because he gets to de-virginify John Sheppard on a brand new ship which they don't have to return to anyone. He still doesn't get to name it, though.
a)It's Basingstoke, come on.
b)It's Ronon/Rodney, omg squee.
c)You get to pick your own ending!!!!!!!
e)Ronon gets prettier the more you tan him.
6) There is no rule #6.
The following contains rambling story ideas, which I want to find under my coffee cup tomorrow morning but probably won't.