the stars like dust

Stories I Long to Read, Or: What Does the ACLU Say about Enslaving Fiction Writers?

SPN RPS:

• The one where Jensen Ackles loses his looks.  Not a horrible accident or anything, just age and thinning hair and plumpness and dry lips and a bad case of skin problems, and of course he thinks his career will tank and nobody will ever love him again. He's had two wives and three children, and now he's divorced and trying to keep himself together, drinking a little too much and feeling washed up. But he runs into Jared, who is doing blockbusters, and finds out that Jared used to be in love with him. He tries to hide his stomach and wears makeup and a toupee, thinking he can fool Jared into seeing him as the same guy, but of course Jared sees right through it. And it turns out that Jared's still pretty crazy about him, and it never had anything to do with his looks at all. And he starts getting parts he wouldn't have gotten before, and realizes that his pretty face was only the icing on the cake.
• That story, you know the one, with Jared and Jensen's housewarming party? Where they wake up half-drunk and obviously well-laid, but neither of them can remember who they slept with? Needless to say, someone else at the party must know, so they begin a campaign to find out. And the ending really writes itself, doesn't it?
• Misha Collins falls in love with Jeffrey Dean, and Jared and Jensen aren't gay at all, and still have to try and help the two meet up. Then they spend so much time rationalizing the whole thing that they start questioning each other's orientation. It's a game of finding evidence that the other one is attracted to men, with every likelihood of causing serious trouble. Meanwhile, Jeffrey and MIsha have a short, intense affair that leads to drama and lengthy articles about Jeffrey's penchant for infidelity. The J's try to quit the game, but find that it has lingering consequences.

Bandom:

• FOB is making a new album. Too bad Pete's deal with the forces of darkness is coming due. Patrick's going to be really pissed.
• Pete's a cab driver who wanted to be a rock star. Patrick's a rock star who hates the business. Three hours in traffic can change your life.
• The last time Frank Iero saw Gerard Way, they both had bruised faces and blood on their knuckles. Wife-swapping didn't work so well for them. When Ray Toro talks them both into a reunion tour, they both have to confront their history.

Kids in the Hall RPS:

• If Bruce McCullough weren't such a scheming slut, Kevin McDonald would still have the love of Dave Foley. Scott Thompson and Mark McKinney have 24 hours to seduce Bruce into dumping Dave, or Kevin is going to leave the Kids and the whole show may fall apart. But what Mark doesn't know is that Scott has loved him for years. Can Scott stay, if Bruce, that little tramp, steals Mark's heart?