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stungunbilly Dec. 28th, 2007 07:15 pm)
stungunbilly Dec. 28th, 2007 07:15 pm)Yay for sneaking off to stealth post!
I've managed to get in a tiny bit of writing time; mostly on the Frank/Patrick sex thing, but a tiny piece of the therapy story and well. This quick little piece.
Five Times Pete Thought He Might Have Lost His Patrick (really, Four Times Pete Thought He Might Have Lost His Patrick and One Time He Deliberately Misplaced Him)
by stungunbilly
Notes: This is fictional, and that means it isn’t true. Unless it is, but I totally didn’t know, I swear. Also, Pete? Don’t read this, or give it to Mikey Way. Thanks.
1. Warped Tour ‘05
Pete never saw the Frank thing coming.
They spent no real time hanging out; Patrick’s tour-buddies that year were Bob and Gerard, who would let him use Ray’s equipment and also got him hooked on gaming. Frank and Patrick seemed kind of like oil and water, and avoided each other by instinct.
It obviously took several minutes for Patrick to even notice there was someone else in the room; he didn’t even seem to hear the fucking door open. His legs were around his ears and his mouth was open and wet, Frank’s hips rocking him rhythmically, and when his eyes (pupils blown, glassy and dark) finally fell on Pete, he just moaned a little. Like he was coming, like it didn’t matter, and Pete just sat in the hotel hallway for an hour after Frank left without moving. When he finally returned to their room, Patrick was asleep.
After that, Pete kept thinking things like “I didn’t even know he was that flexible,” and “Since when does he fuck guys?” and sometimes he saw the subtle (he hadn’t even noticed before!) exchanges where Frank would tilt his head and Patrick would freeze for a second and wait, maybe a minute, before following.
Patrick never mentioned Pete walking in on them, like it had never happened. Pete wondered incessantly if he had been hidden by shadow or if Patrick had been too high (on sex, on who-knew-what) to notice him.
2. Young Wild Things
Lisa originally was just a cute girl Patrick kept holding hands with, not even someone with a name. “That curly-haired chick who keeps sitting on your lap,” said Pete. “What’s her name again?” Ashlee didn’t like her, said she was a wannabe-hippie girl. So they didn’t hang out as much when she was around, and really, Patrick had been crushing on Victoria for months, so.
She wasn’t mean to the fans, or anything like that. But she started steering Patrick away from people, and then sometimes from Pete. It was no big deal; Ashlee did that once in awhile. But it bothered him.
Lisa was cute, but not beautiful, or maybe that was just Pete’s idea of beautiful, because at one point Patrick was a little drunk and eating some vegan stir-fry thing she’d made and he started talking to Pete about her. Patrick thought he wasn’t good enough, smart enough, hot enough, for a brilliant, talented girl like that. Apparently she wanted them to buy a house together, and Patrick thought she’d be an excellent mother. Pete wanted Patrick to have kids, he did. But he kind of hated Lisa, even if he never planned on telling anyone about it.
3. Four Years, Seriously.
She was Patrick’s girl for so many years that Pete hardly noticed her after awhile. Anna didn’t demand much, never came on tour. He had kind of figured she and Patrick would eventually marry, which was fine. Things wouldn’t have to change, really, and there would be mini-Patricks to love.
Pete loved kids, but wasn’t sure if he’d be a good father, so vicarious parenthood through Patrick might actually be the best scenario. He would sleep in the spare bedroom a lot, maybe with a kid or two, and Patrick would be the first thing he’d see in the mornings. In his fantasies, Anna would smile in the background, make them all breakfast, and tell Pete he was like one of her kids.
Later, when Patrick’s eyes were swollen and red, he talked to Pete’s shoulder , soft-voiced and muffled, and Pete thought he heard his own name. But then, when Patrick smiled weakly at him and said, “I just think she never got to know you, she just believed the stuff she heard,” Pete knew he should ask what that meant.
But Patrick was warm against him, and although Pete knew Anna was maybe what Patrick really needed, he just held him close and breathed against the top of his head.
4. TRL
Pete didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but the voices from the staff break room backstage were martini-loud. He recognized that one sleazy MTV suit’s voice from the earlier conversation about what Pete could and couldn’t say on television, and Patrick’s was always unmistakable. They weren’t arguing, exactly, but Patrick sounded almost strident.
“You would be perfect for it,” and the guy had the smarm up to, like, eleven. “Your voice, her- well, *everything*. She’d be the perfect foil to your talented normal guy. It’s a long-term project, Patrick, you should really think about it. Rock stardom only lasts so long, and you are the one doing all the heavy lifting.”
“So, what,” Pete heard Patrick say through the angry rushing in his head. “I ditch my band and strike while the iron is hot, or whatever cliché covers this? Because from where I’m standing, it looks to me like there are a thousand guys with ‘the talent’ sitting in their basements because they had no Pete Wentz to do all the really difficult shit about getting famous for them.”
Pete paused, hand on the door, heart thumping, and allowed himself to think that, maybe just this once, he could let something go and it would come back to him.
5. The Longest Winter
“So, I kind of figured you and me were a team,” says Pete. He ghosts a hand across Patrick’s hair, not quite smoothing the disarranged strands. It’s getting redder all the time, matches his sideburns now. When Pete continues his whispered confession, it stirs a little from his breath. Patrick doesn’t move, except the gentle rise and fall of his chest with his breathing.
“I really wanted to make Ashlee happy, planned to have kids and everything. She’s, I don’t know, she’s really a nice girl, Patrick. Almost as nice to me as you, only she just didn’t know how hard it would be. It isn’t like it was with them, I swear. This time I know it was my fault.
When you broke up with Lisa, I should have just hung out for awhile, but I kind of wanted to. Move in, fill up her space, whatever. Y’know what I mean? Like, um, make her being gone not hurt you, I guess. I know it was stupid. But whoever we’re with, it’s still *us*, you know. About us being with whoever, but still. Us.
And this, we. I’ve pretty much always thought you were hot, or whatever. I just never wanted to make it about that. I’m not sorry for what we did, it’s like, maybe the best sex I’ve ever had, just because it’s you and just sitting next to you on a bus is like, fuck, a Disneyland ride, so fucking was incredible, of course it was great.
But see, I know I tell you, I know you know I love you, but fuck, Patrick, I’m so in love with you, and it’s killing me. It’s all fucked up now, it’s all the stuff I never wanted you to have to deal with, like the way I think about your body all the time, or get stupid and jealous about people who don‘t matter. And so I’m going to go back to LA, so you never have to see all of that, so I can be the guy who is your friend and not hold you back from everything you always say you want, like kids and a stable family and all those things.
This is kind of my big dramatic scene, but you can’t get on my shit about it now, can you? Ha-ha. So, I love you like the stupidest song you ever heard on the radio, like the dumbest movie you ever had to watch with Lisa or whoever. And I’m kind of a shitty guy, so I’m going to fuck off and let you sleep. Bye, Patrick Stump, I’ll call you tomorrow.”
He leans down and kisses Patrick’s forehead, and then picks up his duffle bag and tries to be stealthy creeping out the door. It’s kind of painful, but also a little satisfying; this is the real deal, here, he’s ready to make some big sacrifice for love. Of course, he only makes it halfway down the hall before something heavy swishes by his face and crashes into the wall right next to his head. The next flying object beans him in the back of the knee.
He barely registers the pain before what can only be Patrick lands on him and knocks him to the ground, grabbing his arms. Patrick then pins his arms behind his back, leaning down to snarl venomously into his ear. It’s not what he was expecting, but it definitely makes the whole thing more dramatic.
“All these years, you son of a bitch, and you *still* can’t tell when I’m really asleep?” and Patrick sounds so incredibly hot when he’s pissed off, he really does. It’s amazing that Pete managed to know him for close to nine years without sucking him off while he’s snarling. He decides firmly to make up for lost time.
Pete has to talk fast, ends up missing his flight, but (as he tells the Internet later) he’s always been willing to admit he was wrong before.
~
I've managed to get in a tiny bit of writing time; mostly on the Frank/Patrick sex thing, but a tiny piece of the therapy story and well. This quick little piece.
Five Times Pete Thought He Might Have Lost His Patrick (really, Four Times Pete Thought He Might Have Lost His Patrick and One Time He Deliberately Misplaced Him)
by stungunbilly
Notes: This is fictional, and that means it isn’t true. Unless it is, but I totally didn’t know, I swear. Also, Pete? Don’t read this, or give it to Mikey Way. Thanks.
1. Warped Tour ‘05
Pete never saw the Frank thing coming.
They spent no real time hanging out; Patrick’s tour-buddies that year were Bob and Gerard, who would let him use Ray’s equipment and also got him hooked on gaming. Frank and Patrick seemed kind of like oil and water, and avoided each other by instinct.
It obviously took several minutes for Patrick to even notice there was someone else in the room; he didn’t even seem to hear the fucking door open. His legs were around his ears and his mouth was open and wet, Frank’s hips rocking him rhythmically, and when his eyes (pupils blown, glassy and dark) finally fell on Pete, he just moaned a little. Like he was coming, like it didn’t matter, and Pete just sat in the hotel hallway for an hour after Frank left without moving. When he finally returned to their room, Patrick was asleep.
After that, Pete kept thinking things like “I didn’t even know he was that flexible,” and “Since when does he fuck guys?” and sometimes he saw the subtle (he hadn’t even noticed before!) exchanges where Frank would tilt his head and Patrick would freeze for a second and wait, maybe a minute, before following.
Patrick never mentioned Pete walking in on them, like it had never happened. Pete wondered incessantly if he had been hidden by shadow or if Patrick had been too high (on sex, on who-knew-what) to notice him.
2. Young Wild Things
Lisa originally was just a cute girl Patrick kept holding hands with, not even someone with a name. “That curly-haired chick who keeps sitting on your lap,” said Pete. “What’s her name again?” Ashlee didn’t like her, said she was a wannabe-hippie girl. So they didn’t hang out as much when she was around, and really, Patrick had been crushing on Victoria for months, so.
She wasn’t mean to the fans, or anything like that. But she started steering Patrick away from people, and then sometimes from Pete. It was no big deal; Ashlee did that once in awhile. But it bothered him.
Lisa was cute, but not beautiful, or maybe that was just Pete’s idea of beautiful, because at one point Patrick was a little drunk and eating some vegan stir-fry thing she’d made and he started talking to Pete about her. Patrick thought he wasn’t good enough, smart enough, hot enough, for a brilliant, talented girl like that. Apparently she wanted them to buy a house together, and Patrick thought she’d be an excellent mother. Pete wanted Patrick to have kids, he did. But he kind of hated Lisa, even if he never planned on telling anyone about it.
3. Four Years, Seriously.
She was Patrick’s girl for so many years that Pete hardly noticed her after awhile. Anna didn’t demand much, never came on tour. He had kind of figured she and Patrick would eventually marry, which was fine. Things wouldn’t have to change, really, and there would be mini-Patricks to love.
Pete loved kids, but wasn’t sure if he’d be a good father, so vicarious parenthood through Patrick might actually be the best scenario. He would sleep in the spare bedroom a lot, maybe with a kid or two, and Patrick would be the first thing he’d see in the mornings. In his fantasies, Anna would smile in the background, make them all breakfast, and tell Pete he was like one of her kids.
Later, when Patrick’s eyes were swollen and red, he talked to Pete’s shoulder , soft-voiced and muffled, and Pete thought he heard his own name. But then, when Patrick smiled weakly at him and said, “I just think she never got to know you, she just believed the stuff she heard,” Pete knew he should ask what that meant.
But Patrick was warm against him, and although Pete knew Anna was maybe what Patrick really needed, he just held him close and breathed against the top of his head.
4. TRL
Pete didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but the voices from the staff break room backstage were martini-loud. He recognized that one sleazy MTV suit’s voice from the earlier conversation about what Pete could and couldn’t say on television, and Patrick’s was always unmistakable. They weren’t arguing, exactly, but Patrick sounded almost strident.
“You would be perfect for it,” and the guy had the smarm up to, like, eleven. “Your voice, her- well, *everything*. She’d be the perfect foil to your talented normal guy. It’s a long-term project, Patrick, you should really think about it. Rock stardom only lasts so long, and you are the one doing all the heavy lifting.”
“So, what,” Pete heard Patrick say through the angry rushing in his head. “I ditch my band and strike while the iron is hot, or whatever cliché covers this? Because from where I’m standing, it looks to me like there are a thousand guys with ‘the talent’ sitting in their basements because they had no Pete Wentz to do all the really difficult shit about getting famous for them.”
Pete paused, hand on the door, heart thumping, and allowed himself to think that, maybe just this once, he could let something go and it would come back to him.
5. The Longest Winter
“So, I kind of figured you and me were a team,” says Pete. He ghosts a hand across Patrick’s hair, not quite smoothing the disarranged strands. It’s getting redder all the time, matches his sideburns now. When Pete continues his whispered confession, it stirs a little from his breath. Patrick doesn’t move, except the gentle rise and fall of his chest with his breathing.
“I really wanted to make Ashlee happy, planned to have kids and everything. She’s, I don’t know, she’s really a nice girl, Patrick. Almost as nice to me as you, only she just didn’t know how hard it would be. It isn’t like it was with them, I swear. This time I know it was my fault.
When you broke up with Lisa, I should have just hung out for awhile, but I kind of wanted to. Move in, fill up her space, whatever. Y’know what I mean? Like, um, make her being gone not hurt you, I guess. I know it was stupid. But whoever we’re with, it’s still *us*, you know. About us being with whoever, but still. Us.
And this, we. I’ve pretty much always thought you were hot, or whatever. I just never wanted to make it about that. I’m not sorry for what we did, it’s like, maybe the best sex I’ve ever had, just because it’s you and just sitting next to you on a bus is like, fuck, a Disneyland ride, so fucking was incredible, of course it was great.
But see, I know I tell you, I know you know I love you, but fuck, Patrick, I’m so in love with you, and it’s killing me. It’s all fucked up now, it’s all the stuff I never wanted you to have to deal with, like the way I think about your body all the time, or get stupid and jealous about people who don‘t matter. And so I’m going to go back to LA, so you never have to see all of that, so I can be the guy who is your friend and not hold you back from everything you always say you want, like kids and a stable family and all those things.
This is kind of my big dramatic scene, but you can’t get on my shit about it now, can you? Ha-ha. So, I love you like the stupidest song you ever heard on the radio, like the dumbest movie you ever had to watch with Lisa or whoever. And I’m kind of a shitty guy, so I’m going to fuck off and let you sleep. Bye, Patrick Stump, I’ll call you tomorrow.”
He leans down and kisses Patrick’s forehead, and then picks up his duffle bag and tries to be stealthy creeping out the door. It’s kind of painful, but also a little satisfying; this is the real deal, here, he’s ready to make some big sacrifice for love. Of course, he only makes it halfway down the hall before something heavy swishes by his face and crashes into the wall right next to his head. The next flying object beans him in the back of the knee.
He barely registers the pain before what can only be Patrick lands on him and knocks him to the ground, grabbing his arms. Patrick then pins his arms behind his back, leaning down to snarl venomously into his ear. It’s not what he was expecting, but it definitely makes the whole thing more dramatic.
“All these years, you son of a bitch, and you *still* can’t tell when I’m really asleep?” and Patrick sounds so incredibly hot when he’s pissed off, he really does. It’s amazing that Pete managed to know him for close to nine years without sucking him off while he’s snarling. He decides firmly to make up for lost time.
Pete has to talk fast, ends up missing his flight, but (as he tells the Internet later) he’s always been willing to admit he was wrong before.
~
